Couples And The Impact Of Addiction

Couples. They come in all shapes and sizes. But no matter what they may look like, addiction can devastate them.  Addiction is the great leveler which renders all relationships as equal and the same. 

When addiction strikes, exactly what happens to a couple? Usually, the dynamic shapes up something like this. When one partner is using and the other is not, each assumes the role of either the over or under-functioner.  That is, the user under functions and the non-user over functions on  behalf of their spouse. As a therapist I frequently hear the non-using partner complain about how "irresponsible" and "untrustworthy" their partner has become. On the other hand, the user complains that their mate is a "nag" or "always on their case".

So logic would predict that once an addict or alcoholic obtains sobriety that the couple go riding off into the sunset. Nothing could be further from the truth. That is, initially.  Exactly how does a couple make sense out of this seeming contradiction?  After all, recovery and sobriety was what was longed for and prayed for. And now that you have it, you're still miserable! Perhaps George Bernard Shaw said it best when he wrote, "There are two great tragedies in life. One is never getting your heart's desire. The other is to get it."

The lesson being that no matter how attractive and alluring a change may appear it, too, has its downside.  The positives are obvious. Your partner is sober! But things aren't all that much better between the two of you. To begin with, it's important to understand that when a partner obtains sobriety there is usually a redistribution of power along the relationship axis.  The once dependent partner who habitually occupied a one-down position no longer finds himself or herself as the low man on the totem pole. By virtue of being sober, they are now on equal footing or in a symmetrical alignment, so to speak, with their partner.  And, conversely, the non-user is no longer in their advantageous one-up position.  Their over- functioning stance is suddenly challenged. The hyper vigilance which was required when living with an active addict/alcoholic is no longer necessary.  But old habits die hard and it's not so easy to "turn off" years of being super vigilant.

This phase of readjustment can be bewildering and scary for couples. The news being that despite its promise of improvement, change brings turbulence and upset.  This is one reason why many treatment facilities will recommend to a couple that for the first year of sobriety a couple make no major life decisions such as a new job, a move etc. until things have a chance to quiet down.

So how does a couple make the transition to a sober relationship? One thing couples need to remember is that recovery is a joint process which includes both parties. However, this is not to suggest that the sober partner is responsible for their partner's recovery. It just means that one partner cannot be expected to shoulder all the weight toward changing their relationship.  Each person must play his or her own part.

Just as AA or any of the 12-Step programs is the cornerstone upon which successful recovery rests, Al- anon is a crucial step for the non-using partner. I tell couples that Alanon is critical because it not only educates the non-using spouse about the physical and psychological aspects of chemical dependency, it addresses the non-user's interdependency with their spouse.  That is, it helps the non-user identify those behaviors in which they assume responsibility for their loved one.  And that's critical. This could be anything as simple as cleaning up after their partner in the kitchen to making excuses for them at the office. 

 Alanon is helpful because it teaches people how to differentiate between what is their responsibility and what is not.  It provides lessons in limit setting and boundaries for people who are unaccustomed in knowing when and where to draw the line, so to speak. It also encourages the non-user to express their own needs, which may have been long neglected, and to define the limits of their tolerance as well.  Doing so, eliminates ambiguity and helps to clear the air.

As a wise mentor once explained to me, the thing to remember is that all couples undergo a continual process of resettling. It's just what life is all about.

Scary Halloween Movies

Well, not all of them are scary. A few are funny and light. In these, the supernatural and the natural collide with utterly charming results. This genre includes:

-I Married a Witch with Veronica Lake and Frederic March. An oldie but a goodie from 1942.  Ms. V is at her slinkiest and most sublime. And, oh baby, that hair! Bewitching. In fact, the hit television series "Bewitched" starring Elizabeth Montgomery was based on this film.  However, you'd never have found VL doing anything so vulgar as twitching her nose. Although, I don't know how she maintained her dignity wearing that hat!

-Bell, Book and Candle with Kim Novak, Jimmy Stewart, Jack Lemmon and Hermione Gingold (I actually sat and had a drink with Miss Gingold. She always carried her diminutive Pekingese dog with her). Contemporary urban witches in Greenwich Village. Originally a play on Broadway by John Van Druten. It featured a great Siamese cat named Pyewacket, Kim Novak's character's familiar (all witches, and Novak plays a witch, have a familiar to  help them cast their spells.).  George S. Kaufman (the Marx Brothers, Dinner at Eight, the Algonquin Round Table) gave his granddaughter, a childhood friend of mine, a Siamese cat and because she could not keep him because she was allergic, she gave him to me.  His name was Pyewacket and I adored him.

The remainder are your "scaries":

-Any or all films by the great Val Lewton who produced small masterpieces of psychological terror and horror for RKO in the 1940s. A personal fave is Cat People, again from 1942, with Simone Simon, at her most kittenish. It's the psychological study of a young woman who avoids romantic intimacy for fear she will turn into a cat and kill her lover. Just when you thought you couldn't go any further into mining the psyche for fears and tears, Lewton takes you deeper. Other great titles include I Walked with a Zombie, The Seventh Victim, The Leopard Man and The Isle of the Dead. Martin Scorsese made a terrific documentary about Lewton titled "Val Lewton: The Man in the Shadows". Highly recommended.

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The original film adaptation of Shirley Jackson's novella The Haunting of Hill House from 1963 starring Claire Bloom and Julie Harris. One of the creepiest and scariest ever. I remember going to see it in NYC at the Coronet Theater on Third Avenue and 61st Street. People were literally screaming and jumping out of their seats. Myself included. Shudder.

-The Innocents adapted for the screen by none other than Truman Capote from the Henry James novel The Turn of the Screw.  Stars Deborah Kerr. A good old-fashioned ghost story with a psychosexual twist. It's got it all.  Insanity, evil children (or are they?), a perverse caretaker, a suicidal lover. Enough psychopathology to go around and please the most discerning palette.

-Psycho  Need I say more? Positively iconic. Still The Champ. It's just as scary the 25th time you've seen it as the first. Never fails to shock or needle itself under your skin. Insidious, suspenseful and terrifying.  More popcorn please!

-Don't Look Now. A real killer from the director Nicolas Roeg. Set in Venice with the gorgeous Julie Christie and the adorable Donald Sutherland (they were having a romance at the time). Involves second sight, strange twin sisters, a malevolent dwarf, premonitions and seances.Totally creepy. Contains a very famous sex scene between Christie and Sutherland which is pretty amazing and  often copied in other films. Not much chance replicating the chemistry between those two however. Highly charged and erotic. You can't make that stuff up.

-The Shining  Stanley Kubrick's very brilliant take on the nightmarish institution of marriage. Really. That's what the film is actually about.  Kubrick used Stephen King's rather conventional ghost story to satirize the myth of marriage. Instead, Kubrick let's us in on the dirty little secret that  marriage is the real horror show. However, this  does not detract  from the sheer scariness of this movie which is bone crushing. You remain frozen in your seat,  too scared to move while watching between your fingers.

-The Exorcist. Is there anyone out there who didn't go home cowering after leaving the theater? I was hypervigilant for weeks after seeing it.  Even had nightmares of that dam Virgin Mary statue spouting blood from all her orifices. This film had it all.Violation of the sacred, exultation of the profane, disgusting images (projectile vomiting for God's sake!), grotesqueness, exploitation of a child. Those images were highly disturbing and continue to intrude when you least expect it.

Halloween

Well, it's time for Halloween again and I love it! I have to admit that Halloween remains my favorite holiday.  Perhaps it's the day's irreverence toward social convention that I find so appealing.. After all, this is the time when the social order crumbles and mayhem prevails. Hierarchical inversion is the name of the game. Kids rule. Parents serve. The living cower. The dead run riot.

Just for the fun of it I've made a list of interesting

Halloween Folklore and Superstitions.

-Did you know that the pumpkin pie and the Jack o' lantern symbolize the sun? They represent our attempt to pay homage to the Autumn's decreasing daylight.

-If you scatter cayenne pepper around the perimeter of your home it can break bad spells. It's also recommended for love potions as it contains "fiery" elements.

-It's believed that the lit candle inside a jack o' lantern wards off evil.

-A person born on Halloween can talk and commune with the spirit world.

- If you want to meet a witch, wear your clothes inside out on Halloween night.

- If you want to meet a ghost, just wear some lavender around your neck.

-According to the Welsh, if you sneeze on Halloween, your soul will leave your body. Remember to say "God bless you".

-It's bad luck if you get out of bed in the morning left foot first.

-More bad luck if you sing before breakfast.

-If a clock that wasn't working suddenly chimes, it heralds death.

-It's good luck to sleep facing south.

-Even better luck if you dream of a white cat.

-If you want to catch  a glimpse of your future husband, put some fresh rosemary and a silver coin under your pillow on Halloween.

-Burning sage in your home banishes all evil spirits and energy.

-Aloe Vera is thought to guard against evil.

-Peering into the flame of a candle on Halloween night allows you to see into the future.

-According to ancient Celtic belief, it is believed to be bad luck if you allow a fire to burnout on Halloween.

-Bobbing for apples is a traditional game played by young people on Halloween. Historically, the first person to bite into an apple would be the first to marry.  The apple is a symbol of fertility.  Hence, it's symbolic significance in this ritualistic past time.

Famous Halloween Birthdays

-Dan Rather  1931

-Jane Pauley 1950

-John Keats 1795

-Peter Jackson 1961

-Vanilla Ice 1968

-John Candy 1950

-Jan Vermeer 1632

-Dale Evans 1912

-Adapted from www.suite101.com,www.thehollidayspot.com,www.farmersalamanac.com

Charlie Sheen: Hollywood Bad Boy

Charlie just doesn't seem to get it, does he?  He never seems to learn from his mistakes. Perhaps he doesn't see his outrageous behavior as problematic. That may be hard for some of us to comprehend, but there are people out there who just don't feel as if they are accountable to anyone, least of all themselves. And there are those who literally cannot get sober. It's almost a matter of their physical constitution which continues to fail them despite their desire.

In looking at Charlie's name, what immediately popped out at me was the abundance of 'es' which correspond to the numerical value of 5. And, if you've been following my blog, you know that 5 is the most physically intense of all the numbers.  It is particularly volatile and explosive around sex and romance. If the energy of a 5 becomes misaligned or diverted, the result can be nothing short of chaos and mayhem. Charlie Sheen has three 'es and two of them form a pair. In Chinese numerology, pairs of letters and numbers indicate an increase in their intensity and impact which we certainly see played out in his very tumultuous personal life.

Charlie is also missing a 2,4 and 7 from his name. These represent Karmic numbers which symbolize those areas in one's life that still need to be addressed and resolved. So in Charlies' case, the missing 2 would indicate that he is missing balance, stability and harmony which explains why he continues to struggle so dramatically to obtain it.  The number 4, which symbolizes the earth, indicates his not having his feet planted on the ground.  He isn't anchored. Kind of like a ship without a rudder. 4 also represents steadfastness, discipline and conventionality.Finally, the number 7 always signifies spirituality which for millennium has provided solace and peace of mind to troubled souls.

Just to end, I picked one tarot card for Charlie and it was The Moon. How spot on! As I had written in my blog of  April 17th, "the Moon symbolizes the unconscious and all that goes with it e.g., dreams, nightmares, anxiety and  disturbing emotions which we mustn't shun or avoid.  Instead, we need to embrace all of the Moon's gifts, scary or not.  If we allow that to happen, we will receive those messages meant to come through to us. If we reject the stranger aspects of the moon we run the risk of remaining 'stuck' psychologically and spiritually." 

This is advice Charlie needs to consider. As long as he runs from his demons, the more they will dominate him. It's time for him to surrender, for it's at that moment of self-admission that  he will get his power back. It's a paradox. And as with all paradoxes, it may sound counter-intuitive.  Nonetheless, it expresses a fundamental truth.

Sylvia Plath: "Here Lies One Whose Name Was Writ In Water"

Sylvia Plath, the celebrated American poetess was born on October 27th, 1932 and committed suicide, by sticking her young head into a gas oven in her London flat while her two small children slept in the next room, on February 2nd, 1963. She was 30 years old. 

SP's life and work struck a chord with the public and continues to haunt the imagination. Plath particulary holds a spell over women. Perhaps it is because her struggle with depression and her attempts to balance a career with being a mother mirror most women's lives and dilemmas. And if that were not already enough dramatic fodder to sink one's teeth into, her husband, the esteemed English poet Ted Hughes, cheated on her which many people think was the crowning blow that sent SP over the final abyss.

In doing an abbreviated tarot reading for SP, all the hallmarks of her troubled life showed up. The Three of Swords, which depicts a heart impaled by 3 swords, signifying heartbreak and betrayal clearly symbolizes her husband's adultery.  The Ten of Swords which depicts a man, face down on  the ground and impaled by 10 swords, seems to signify SP's debilitating  depression. The card conveys just how oppressive depression is e.g., you literally are "stuck" and "pinned down" to the ground. I also drew the Six of Cups which features two very young children, which would seem to refer to SP's own two children, who were 2 years old and under 1 year old at the time of her death.

What's so very interesting and amazing is that Sylvia Plath, Ted Hughes, and Assia Wevill, the woman with whom TH had an affair and child, all have the number 5 as their  Expressive Number.   5s, being the most intensely physical and energized of all the numbers, have the potential to be and run the risk of being very explosive, particularly  in matters of sex and romance. 

And the name 'Assia Wevill' contains all but one letter, the 'y', in the name 'Sylvia' ,which signifies a deep psychic connection.between these two women.  In fact, Assia also committed suicide, while still living with Ted Hughes just 6 years after Sylvia's. Eerily, she mimicked Plath's death  and stuck her head into a gas oven, as well. Tragically and heartbreakingly, Assia murdered her 6 year old daughter before taking her own life.  And, if that weren't enough to boggle the mind and crack the heart, Plath's son, Nicolas,  hanged himself at age 47.

The epitaph I quoted for Sylvia Plath is, in fact, the epitaph that John Keats wrote for himself and which appears on his gravestone. John Keats died from tuberculosis at age 24.  In that both poets died at so  young an age, the inscription seemed appropriate.

Matthew Weiner: Our Fearless "Mad Men" Leader

Is there anybody out there who does not love the show "Mad Men"? So far, I've not met any detractors. It's really a love affair for most fans, myself included. I've heard the show's creator and impresario, Matthew Weiner,  interviewed several times on NPR and with each time I was struck by his modesty, warmth and intelligence. And being the fan that I am of this terrific show, and of him, I just had to do his numbers.

MW's  birthday is 6/29/1965 which makes him a Cancer and gives him a Destiny Number of 11. In fact, his name corresponds to an 11, as well, and that's one of the 2 Master Numbers, the other being 22.  It's best to think of an 11 as a 2 to the 100th power. That is, they express all the qualities of a 2 but with far more concentration and intensity. The number 2 should play a prominent role in his life as even his last name is a 2.  And 2010 was a 2 year for him to boot! 2s are ruled by the Moon,  giving MW an extra dose of  intuition as Cancers are ruled by the Moon, as well. In fact, he may be a little psychic given all that Moon influence.  The thing to remember about 11s is that they are the visionaries and searchers. They want to enlighten and uplift.

As a Cancer, MW appears, from the little I know about him, consistent with the profile of a Cancer Man.  That is, sensitive and caring. This is a man who is not uncomfortable with his feelings and who can reveal his vulnerability.  However, if he feels too slighted, he will retreat into his shell.

JonBenet Ramsey: Some Observations

This case doesn't want to go away. It continues to fascinate and repel the public's imagination and I include myself in that equation. It contains all the drama and tragedy and bizarreness of a first rate crime novel, only it's not fiction.  If it only were. This is the real life story of a murdered child, probably the most heinous crime imaginable.And still no one has been brought to justice. Recently, JonBenet's older brother Burke, who was 9 years old at the time of his sister's death, is being questioned yet again by the authorities about what he remembers that gruesome night.  As far as I know, Burke has nothing new to add to his prior testimony.

In any event, this recent resurgence in the JonBenet case recharged my own interest in it and I decided to look at her numbers and letters along with those of her parents and brother. The most disturbing finding was that "JonBenet Ramsey"  corresponds to the number 4 and, if you've been following my blog, you know that 4, in China, is associated with "death" as it is a homophone for the Chinese word for"death"   And in Western culture, our unluckiest number is 13 which is a 4 when reduced. Interestingly, she's the only family member with this 4 association.  In fact, her first name is also a 4 and her last name, Ramsey, translates to a 9 which symbolizes endings and if you add the numerical value of her first and last names it equals 13. 

The number 6 is also noteworthy as Jon Benet was 6 when she died, her birthday was on the 8/6/1990, she died on 12/25/1996 and her Destiny Number (derived from her birthday) is also a 6.  I didn't know what to make of all these 6s until the thought occurred to me that perhaps that was her home address and, sure enough, I discovered that she lived on 15th Street which is also a 6. (I might add, that I'm writing this piece on the 15th, another 6.)

When I looked at her parent's and brother's numbers to see if there were any overlaps with Jon Benet's numbers, I found that her father's middle name, "Bennet", is a 6 and that his full name is an 8 which corresponds to the value of the day she died, 12/25/1996. Also, if you add the numbers of his first and last names, that's an 8 as well. Not only did Jon Benet live on 15th Street, but her address was "755", which is also an 8 which is a match for her birth month, August, the 8th month.

What does one make of these seemingly overlapping and interlacing numbers?  I'm not sure.  All I can say with any degree of certainty is that this little girl's name carried some very heavy freight and that the numbers 6 and 8 figured prominately in her brief, young life.

Hunter's Moon

I seem to be on a "moon" kick of late. Perhaps because the moon looms so large on the horizon during this time of year.  As the sun begins it's winter descent, the moon and its eerie light take on a new urgency as we prepare for the darkness of winter.

The Hunter's Moon is also know as a Blood Moon or Sanguine Moon and is always the first full moon after the Harvest Moon, which is the full moon nearest the autumnal equinox.

The Hunter's Moon is said to have gotten  its name because it provided the necessary moonlight for hunting and shooting migrating birds in Northern Europe.  This sobriquet is also to have been used by Native Americans who tracked down their prey during late October and November.

Here in the Northern Hemisphere the Hunter's Moon appears in October or November, but most likely in October. In Western Europe, its appearance was celebrated as a feast day and was called appropriately enough the Feast of the Hunter's Moon, although the tradition faded away sometime by the 18th century.

Neither the Hunter's Moon nor the Harvest are especially brighter or more luminous than any other full moon. However, all full moons possess their own unique characteristics depending on the whereabouts of the ecliptic in the sky at the time of year that they are visible. 

What makes the Harvest Moon and the Hunter's Moon unique is the particular time they rise after sunset, which eliminates any protracted period of darkness between the setting of the sun and the moonrise, enabling hunters and farmers in the field to carry out their tasks late into the day and into the night.

adapted from Wikipedia and the Farmer's Almanac

The Waxing Crescent Moon and It's Meaning

Tonight's moon is a waxing crescent one. The word "crescent" comes from the Latin verb "to grow" and literally means "waxing" or "increasing". Over time, "crescent" has become to refer to either the waxing or waning shape of the moon. Because of its association with growth, the "crescent" became a symbol for fertility and fecundity e.g., Aphrodite/Venus is often depicted wearing a hair ornament in the shape of a crescent moon.

The direction in which the two "horns" of the crescent moon point indicate whether a crescent is waxing (young and increasing) or waning (old and decreasing). In the Northern hemisphere eastward pointing horns indicate a waxing crescent, whereas westward pointing horns indicate a waning crescent. However, in the Southern hemisphere just the reverse applies.

Whenever the moon is waxing, especially when it's in its crescent phase and is growing, it's a propitious time to begin a new venture, experiemtingg with new ideas and turning over a new leaf. It's also the time to throw out what you don't need and "clean house", so to speak.  This may mean discarding the excess material things in your life or eliminating those relationships in your life which prove unsatisfying and unfullfilling.

For more fascinating information on the moon and its phases go to www.ezwitchcraft.com and www.angelfire.com Not only are they fun, but they're factual too. 

Stephen Moyer: October 11th Birtday

For those of you who are interested, but didn't have a chance to read it, I wrote a blog about Stephen Moyer and Anna Pacquin on June 20th which looks at their relationship.  Since then, they were married on August 22nd which corresponds to the number 6. Coincidently, the 6th card of the tarot's Major Arcana is The Lovers.

10/10/10

It's here! 10/10/10! So, is it all what it's cracked up to be?  You be the judge.

Symbolism of the Number 10

-10 was the Pythagorean symbol of perfection.

-Humans have 10 fingers and 10 toes. Counting on one's fingers probably led to our decimal number system.

-According to H.P. Blavatsky, founder of the Theosophical Center in New York City, the 1 followed by the 0 represents the column and the circle, symbolizing the male and the female.  Looked at this way, 10 can also symbolize androgyny as it incorporates both male and female elements.

-In Mayan culture, 10 is associated with the end of a cycle and the beginning of another.  10 was regarded as the number of life and death.

-The Holy Ghost descended on the Apostles 10 days after the Resurrection.

-There were 10 plagues of Egypt sent by God.

-The 10 Commandments from God to Moses.

-There are 10 generations from Adam until Noah.

-In China, men and women possess 10 souls. 3 superior souls and 7 inferior ones.

-The 10 Sibyls, or Prophetess, inspired by Apollo, who foretold  misfortune.

-The symbol for one's 10th wedding anniversary is tin.

-DJs speak of the 'top 10'.

-A beautiful woman is referred to as a 10.

-There's the Big 10 in college basketball.

-The Chinese believe that when a number appears in pairs it symbolizes good luck e.g., double happiness. In fact, the more times a lucky number is repeated one after another, the more potent the luck or good fortune.

-In numerology, 10/10/10 corresponds to a 3 the number of the Trinity in Christianity. In China, the number 3 is a homophone for their word for 'birth' and is considered good luck i.e., 3's a charm.

For those of you who would like to learn about the number 10, I suggest you go online to the Encyclopedia Britannica, Wikipedia and Ride the Beast (which is a religious site, but full of interesting facts about the number 10).

John Lennon: 1940-1980

As it's the 70th year of John Lennon's birth, I was curious about his numbers and his wife's, Yoko. Here are some of the interesting things I discovered about them . 

John was born 10/9/1940 which corresponds to a Life Path number of 1. And a 1 he was. Leader. Pioneer. Self-starter. Original. Every positive trait you could possibly attribute to a 1, he possessed. And if that weren't enough, his Expression Number,derived from the numerical value of the letters in his full name including his middle name, Winston,is also 1.

JL was born on the 9th and YO on the 18th which corresponds to a 9 in numerology as you always reduce a sum to the smallest single digit.

YO's Life Path number is 9 (2/28/1933). Sean Lennon, JL's and YO'l son, was born on his father's birtday, 10/9.

JL died 12/8/1980 which translates to a 2 year and 1980 was a 2 year for YO.  However, it was  a 1 year for JL which symbolizes his having come full circle e.g., he was born in a 9 year and died in a 1 year , which is a bit counter intuitive. One would expect just the opposite. Even so, 9s still dominate. The day JL died, 12/8, corresponds to a 9 and the year, 1980, is also a 9. The number 9 symbolizes endings. In China, it's associated withe the emperor and exalted status.

I also checked out Mark David Chapman, JL's assassin, numbers.  MDC's Expression number is 22, one of the 2 Master Numbers.  22s are people who concretize their plans. They execute them, so to speak, and leave their mark on the world. Pardon the macabre puns.  Interestingly, YO's Expression Number is 11, which is the other Master Number, or  2 to a much higher vibration. And if you add MDC's birthday and birth month to JL's birth year you get an 11 year which makes for the odd coincidence.

Now, if you omit JL's middle name, Winston, his Expression Number becomes a 4 which is what 22 really is, but to a much higher and intense frequency. So there is another match, which brings JL's and MDC's destinies crisscrossing each other yet again.

And, the numberical value of the The Dakota, the apartment building in New York City where JL and YO lived and where he was murdered, also corresponds to a 4 ,which in Chinese culture, is the worst luck number as it is a homophone for their word for 'death'.

Laura Day and Adam Robinson: When Love Goes Wrong

I had never heard of Laura Day until a friend told me about her, so I Googled her and read that she is an enormously successful self-help author and guru who charges her clients, who include Jennifer Aniston and Demi Moore, $10,000 a month for guidance with every aspect of their lives. Nice work if you can get it! What intrigued me about her is that her ex-lover Adam Robinson, a founder of the Princeton Review and the author of his own giant best seller "What Smart Students Know",  is suing Day for $14,000,000! Ouch! Robinson claims that he wrote most of Day's big bestseller "How to Rule Your Life From Your Couch" (what exactly does that mean? And isn't "ruling the world" a bit antipodal to spirituality as it smacks of arrogance and grandiosity?).  In any event, I got to wondering about this couple. Were they star crossed from the start? Does Robinson have a legitimate claim? After all, where there's smoke, there is usually fire. Or is he just spewing sour grapes because his ex has left him in the passing lane? Well, let's take a look at their numbers and see what we find. Unfortunately, I couldn't locate Robinson's birthday, so I consider this reading a bit incomplete.

Laura Day's Expression Number (reveals one's personality) is an 11 and, if you've been following my blog, you know that 11 is one of 2 Master Number, the other is 22. 11s want to 'spread the light'. These are the visionaries who are often intense or high strung. Think of an 11 as a very concentrated 2. That is, a 2 to the highest power and frequency. 2s are the mediators and harmonizers. They are often psychic or intuitive.  All in all, Day's Expression Number is a perfect match of who she is a bona fide 11.

Her birthday is March 22, 1959 and her Destiny Number is 4 (the Destiny Number is derived from her birthday). 4, of course, is 2 doubled as well as being the worker bee. They apply practicality and know-how to their work and careers. They keep their eyes on the prize and are intent on obtaining it. However, 4 is a tricky number as in Chinese numerology 4 is the most unlucky of numbers as it is a homophone for their word 'death'. So one could surmise that Day will not only experience enormous success, but may find herself knocked off from her perch sometime during her career. Could this be the impending lawsuit?

Adam Robinson's Expression Number is 8, which just happens to be the jackpot of all numbers. It promises health, wealth and prosperity. In fact, the Chinese rever this number so much that they opened their Summer Olympics on 8/08/08 at 8:08pm! 8s are usually strong and successful as they emit a material vibration. Interestingly enough, 8 is 4 twice (Day's Life Path Number) and reflects a double-bodied quality in that the upper-half mirrors, or twins, the bottom half.  Here's the thing about double-bodied signs or symbols. They always reflect a dual nature. On the one hand generous and the other hand withholding or one part forgiving and one part vindictive and so on.  It's all about which impulse dominates at any given time.

Laura and Adam were most certainly a love match at one time as their names share a letter and sharing letters usually bodes well for a couple.  In their case, they share the vowel 'a' which corresponds to a 1 in numerology. 'As' are fiery and intense. They like to lead and not follow.  They can stand on their own and often have issues with authority. They emanate a strong yang, or masculine, energy. When their energy becomes distorted and out of alignment, they can be stubborn and headstrong with little flexibility.  As 'a' is the only letter that these two shared and given that Adam begins with an 'a' and that Laura ends with an 'a' I can see where this couple had its fair share of struggle when it came to who's in charge. I suspect theirs was quite the tempestuous relationship and its no wonder that it went up in smoke.

Just one other thing, Robinson and Day are each missing an 8 from their letters ( a missing number is refered to as a Karmic number which means whatever needed to be perfected in a previous lifetime will keep resurfacing until you get whatever "it" is right)  and as 8 symbolizes finance, it's not surprizing that what has brought them back together again, like filings to a magnet, is a dispute over money.

My hunch is that the lawsuit will be settled out of court. I would be very surprized if it weren't. There is seldom anything to be gained by engaging in that kind of "he said/she said".

The Planet Venus

"One Touch of Venus" a film from the 40s starring the radiant Ava Gardiner, Venus de Milo the celebrated Roman sculpture, "Venus in Bluejeans" as sung by the '50s teenage heartthrob Bobby Vee, Venus Williams the tennis star, and "Venus" as song by still another '50s teenage heartthrob, Frankie Avalon.   No matter what the medium, Venus appears in a variety of guises throughout our popular culture.

Venus, or Aphrodite as the ancient Greeks christened her, is the goddess of love and beauty. The 'dreamiest of the dreamy'.  She is one of the 7 classical planets, which means they can be seen with the naked eye and were known to the ancient astrologers and astronomers before the advent of the telescope. The other classical planets include the Sun, Moon, Mercury, Mars, Jupiter and Saturn.

Venus is the second brightest object in the night sky, the moon being the brightest.  In Roman and Greek mythology she was famous for stirring the god's and men's passions alike and proved irresistible to both. In astrology, Venus is identified with the principles of harmony, balance, beauty, empathy and compassion. She is drawn towards pleasure and sensuality. She places great stock in her creature comforts and is the most feminine of all the signs of the zodiac. Venus influences all of our romantic relations, marriages and business partnerships. She governs our sex lives as well as the arts. However, Venus is not always charm and harmless as she is  known to have 'an iron hand in a velvet glove" when it suits her.

In medicine, Venus is associated with the lumbar region (or lower back), the veins, the parathyroid, throat and kidneys.

Venus is the planet most identified with the day Friday.  In the romance languages (those derived from Latin) which include Spanish, French and Italian, the word for Friday often resembles the word Venus (viernes, vendredi ad venerdi respectively).

In Chinese astrology, Venus is associated with the most precious and coveted of metals, gold, which the Chinese ascribe the qualities of strength,persistence and endurance.

In Indian astrology, Venus is known as Shukra and symbolizes wealth, pleasure and fecundity.

In Norse mythology, Venus is associated with their goddess Freyja, the goddess of love and beauty.

adapted from Wikipedia

The Chariot

The Chariot, the 7th card of the Major Arcana of the tarot, symbolizes dominance and victory. Predictably, it vibrates with a masculine energy. It's also associated with personal will, perseverance and fortitude. The driver of the chariot depicts energy, intensity and focus. When drawn in a reading it reminds us that in order to bring our plans to completion we need to draw upon our most innermost resources, be they emotional or spiritual or both, and galvanize them with  a noble purpose and intent.

On the other hand, if the energy of the Chariot runs amok, and we subvert that passion into negative energy we run the risk of quite literally running 'off the rails' whereby we may find ourselves engaging in relationships and behavior which goes against our better judgment. The life lesson is, don't assume the reins unless you do so with humility and grace.